Trunkles at Large

I recently read about a man in Albuquerque (think it was there) who has just been busted for his TWENTY-EIGHTH drink driving offence. And that got me wondering where the justice system is going wrong. You see, I take a very dim view of pissed-up motoring, it has a tendency to kill people and that sucks.

I’m wondering if harsher penalties would be appropriate and also changing the charge to something different. But what charge? Bear with me and I will explain. Everyone who drives a car knows that drink driving is a no-no. So, if you have been drinking and get behind the wheel then you know that what you are about to do is likely to kill someone; your actions are premeditated. (Worked out where I’m going yet?) If you commit a premeditated act that is likely to kill someone then you are committing attempted murder. I’m sure any legal eagles will find holes in that argument but hey, what happened to the spirit of the law?

To charge with attempted murder is, perhaps, excessive but the punishment should, I feel, reflect the gravity of the offence. Having said that, a little leeway might be a good thing. A damn good kicking before the door gets really slammed. Perhaps a punishment regime something like this…

In New Zealand the blood alcohol limit is 80mg of alcohol per decilitre of blood, over that and your busted. Perhaps lowering this to, say, 75 would be a good move. But that becomes the level at which you get the kicking, not the door slam. Between 75 and 85 (see, slight increase there) you get a hefty fine, $500 comes to mind and no, you DON’T get to pay it off at $1 a week. You have 30 days to pay or your vehicle gets sold. Did I forget to mention that your vehicle got impounded when you were busted? Oh dear, silly me. Anyway, once you’ve paid the fine you get your vehicle back, if it goes past 30 days, you don’t. You got a damn good kicking and your status has changed slightly, ‘cos you don’t get a second chance. Anything over 75 mg/dl now gets the door slammed.

The door slam. Your vehicle is forfeit. I don’t care what it is, it’s gone. It gets sold and the proceeds go towards paying for the newspaper adverts that show your name, address and picture telling everyone that you are an asshole. You were driving a new Ferrari? Bummer. It isn’t your vehicle? Then the owner might like a quiet word with you before they sue your ass off! It’s your wife’s/girlfriends car? Guess who ain’t getting laid for a very long time! You also loose your driving licence. Sliding scale of time I think: 6 months for the first 5 points over the limit, a year for the next 5 points and permanently for anything over that. No special needs licences for work or whatever - you lost it, period.

Get busted a second time and you loose your car and your licence, period.

Get busted a third time and you are really in the poo. Thick smelly brown stuff, right up to your neck, ‘cos you are heading for PMITA jail for 1 year for each point over the limit you were. Not only were you pissed but you seem determined to kill someone and that ain’t the way to do things.

Remember I mentioned attempted murder earlier. If you are driving and kill someone and you are over the lower limit then you have an automatic conviction for murder. PMITA jail for a life sentence. No appeals, ‘cos there ain’t one. You were over the limit and that’s that.

So folks, there you are, my way of getting drunk drivers off the road. Will it ever happen? Not on your life! The idea of actually doing something to keep pissed up motorists off the road would have the politicos up in arms, it would mean they were seen to actually deal with a problem, and we can’t have that, can we?

And no, I haven’t lost a friend or family member to a drunk driver, it’s just something I feel strongly about.